Only the human mind invents categories and tries to force facts into separated pigeon-holes. The living world is a continuum in each and every one of its aspects. The sooner we learn this concerning sexual behavior the sooner we shall reach a sound understanding of the realities of sex.
First I will like to give the view of homosexuality in Africa and the circumstances surrounding it;
Homosexuality is a sexual orientation that is not welcomed in the continent of Africa except in the country South Africa, actually in countries like Sudan a homosexual can be put to death. South Africa has a complex and diverse history regarding gay rights, South Africa is the only country in the continent to accept homosexuality and the fifth in the world to give rights to gay, transgender and lesbian citizens. With all the above in which South Africa can be proud of, gay citizens still suffer from social stigma, high rates of HIV(fault of theirs) and serious homophobic violence. It is good to know that the legal frame-work for gay people is good enough at least on paper.
A recent survey (by the Pew Center) found that around 31% of South Africans found homosexuality acceptable. That’s a whole lot better than Uganda, where only 1% of people surveyed accepted homosexuality, and 98% rejected it. But the South African survey reflects that on average two out of every three South Africans thinks homosexuality is unnatural and repugnant. It may be surprising but in Uganda, there is a high possibility that a good number of people who find homosexuality repugnant are actually homosexuals who “PRETEND” in order to live up to the norms and expectations of their society, funny but not what we are treating today. Probably the pretenders do what they do in order to avoid a litany of colorful abuses that may hit against them like cold steel against glass.
Today’s article is about a young gay boy in South Africa who is unbreakable as iron and defeats his society that is deep and dark as night called Tru Ulisses and his experiences and difficulties as a gay south African. He wears an ear that seem to be deaf as a dead man’s ear to all the terrific and disastrous claims of his society. He has sworn to barricade the road to truth and break the mentality of his people who seem to be hard as bronze. With emotion surged in his soul like a storm, his determination to give a light to his people continue as the stars that shine. He claims his memories and experiences haunt him like the memory of some formal sorrow and so he has decided to give an account of his painful experiences as a gay South African and please hear him out below.
Out of 54 countries in Africa south Africa standout to be the one that support Gay liberal laws, yes the constitution supports it but only a minority of its citizens do. Man flock from all corners of Africa to this promised paradise to have a taste of the forbidden fruit.
In some parts of South Africa is safe to walk around proud with your head stuck in the clouds ,just like heaven there are angels and demons ready to paint hearts black .We have Pagans preaching the gospel of hate and some even practise what they preach, Raping, murdering and direct hate speech towards us. But that does not get us down to our asses but we slay, strive and survive. Being gay to us is Royalty. commoners have always hated on the Royals. A king can not be made but is born with a fate of one day becoming a sitter of the throne, one can not be made gay he is born that way.
We all have our cross to bear in life, to some of us is being gay. From an early age you got to paint yourself with all the colours or the rainbow just to fit in, or rather camouflage yourself with the rest. I was gay as long as i could remember, coming out was never an easy thing but i knew i had to.. to be in full potential i had to be myself. Just the same with other teenagers who came out to their parents we were told that is just a phase that was going to pass as the time floats on water like a feather.
Some of us have hard-headed fathers and hard-hearted mothers, fortunately my dad was a considerate man. But my mom had a play that she wrote for me to be played in the biggest stage called the world. Just like all mothers, she did not wish, nor dreamt of her son to turn gay, little did they know that “we are born that way”. You can never divorce family no matter the weights of their sins, they always come around and give warm hugs and sweet kisses, after long tug of war with her she finally let go of the rope and held on to me.
When we talk about gays, first thought that cross most of the people minds is Flamboyant, sissy, loud and less masculine, but in South Africa those kings just make approximately 35%% of the whole gayville. Despite the laws most guys prefer camouflaging with the heterosexuals, to hide means to be safe. A proud 19-year-old gay boy who walks around with the rainbow refracting its light upon his path had this to say
“We’re victims to straight homophobes that wanna corrective rape us with the phrases
“You’ll feel what a woman feels when we fuck her vagina (because) you want to be one ” or
“This is how a real man feels like” and wanna make us their pound cakes for their needs whenever a girl refuses to sleep with them and some girls feel threatened by us cause most of gay guys are hot, handsome, sexy and of course educated and they think its our fault for turning them gay little do they know they were born that way”.Jay Segal
The sad truth is that most bisexual men see women as “Walking Wombs” they settle with a woman just because a guy can not give them children and the fear of the unknown from the community and family..
I took a liberty of interviewing a closet Bisexual 26-year-old guy whom shared his story he said that;
“it’s difficult because one must always live to impress both sides. The sad reality one can not fully come out and state that their into men due to community norms. I’m held back by the society that prevent us freedom to move and just enjoy every moment without things being imposed on me, i can settle with a man in relationship but marry one, no! a man cannot give me a family, I am not one to adopt Nope, they are a part of me. Even married people who are bisexual know that women are there to create families I do love them but I need legacy.
As I said south Africa is heaven for gays, A proud gay man from Nigeria residing in Johannesburg Cbd had this to say ” I came to south Africa in 2011 to be myself, to live a life not a lie. At home i told them that i was going to expand my business and further my education that was just a slight slice of the true reason I came. I found more than what i wanted, i found heaven on earth. .i found my love, hubby, husband in 2012 after a year of getting used to the system . i wish i came here earlier in life.
South Africa has quite liberal gay laws (compared to other african countries) it is easier to find and meet gay guys since they do not need to hide etc. That is a good thing in terms of finding a gay friend, hookups but somehow some said looking for love is searching for a river in the desert, but there have been gay weddings that end with happy ever after —Divorces. Overall flowers are given in public and shorts are fired in dark corridors.
Special thanks to Him & Him team jay segal and prince prayer.